The weather-eye notes of Useless

A microclimate can be as small as a shady corner of a garden. I am a few centimetres long and live in the shady corner of a pencil case. I am my own microclimate. Met Office: Climate zones

Permafrost stays frozen all year round. I have been stuck to the bottom of a lunchbox since March. Same thing, really. Encyclopaedia Britannica: tundra climate

Deserts can swing from scorching to freezing in a single day. I go from brand new to grey nub in a single maths test. Met Office: Climate zones

Köppen kept revising his scheme until 1940. I have been revising this note for forty seconds and there is already less of me. Encyclopaedia Britannica: Köppen climate classification

Some marine west coast places get rain on more than 150 days a year. I am an eraser, not a sponge, but I have been mistaken for one. Encyclopaedia Britannica: marine west coast climate

Climate decides what is in your wardrobe; weather decides what you wear today. My wardrobe is a pencil case. My outfit is crumbs. Met Office: What is climate?

Taiga means “land of the little sticks”. I live in a land of little sticks too. They are called pencils, and they keep making mistakes. Encyclopaedia Britannica: taiga

Moving air curves to the right in the northern hemisphere. When I am flicked across a classroom I also curve. Nobody has named it after me yet. Met Office: Global circulation patterns

Not all deserts are hot: in the Gobi the yearly average can be below 0 °C. Not all erasers are useful, either. Hello. Met Office: Climate zones

Without the Gulf Stream, the UK would be much colder. Without me, your homework would be much messier. We all have our jobs. Met Office blog: What is the Gulf Stream and how does it affect UK weather?

Group B is the odd one out, sorted by dryness instead of temperature. I am the odd one out, sorted by pinkness. Encyclopaedia Britannica: Köppen climate classification

Climb a mountain and the temperature falls. Climb a pencil and I fall. Usually off the end. Encyclopaedia Britannica: highland climate

Frost hollows are low spots where the cold air collects. I am a low spot where the pencil shavings collect. Met Office factsheet 4: Climate of the British Isles

Grasses only turned up about 50 million years ago. I turned up on Tuesday and I am already half gone. Encyclopaedia Britannica: savanna

In the tropics, day and night differ more than summer and winter. In my life, before and after exams differ more than anything. Encyclopaedia Britannica: Köppen climate classification